Mike Priess — Waverly, Nebraska

Mike Priess is a douche’s douche. He bought a house with his girlfriend, whom he cheated on his prior girlfriend with, and then proceeded to cheat on her with anything that goes into the bar he works at. Work being a funny term- he really doesn’t work when he’s there- he likes to try to pick up local drunks, staff, even the underage girls, all while handing out free beers, drinks, and shots to the staff all night in an effort to more effectively get into their pants. Mike also likes to do lots of drugs- at work and away- as well as distribute while he’s ‘working’. He loves to send pictures of his little wiener to anybody that has a cell, as well as video himself jacking off in the local gas station bathrooms. I hope he washed his hands for once- since when he’s behind the bar he spends more time trying put his hands down the pants of the scurvy, nasty, fat old blondes he hires to work the bar if he hasn’t gotten one into the cooler to contaminate the food. Mike had herpes, chlamydia, and gonorrhea at his last check. You’ve been warned.

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