He has made a terrible decision to give up on our lives together, the life that I know is worth the effort. I blame him for allowing his emotions to get the best of him. And what he may not understand yet is that life does not deliver love wrapped up in a nice neat package. Love isn’t a state of being, it changes, and it is sometimes situational at best – but it is marked by commitment and choice. It is a decision that may have to be made again and again, even with the same person. Our son no longer has a father to look up to for a committed relationship role model, or to admire. Our daughter needed her dad to be her standard for judging all men. He has lower this standard to very dark depths. I blame you as well, Melissa. I have always said that the other woman shouldn’t matter in situations like this – you are like a tool to get the job done, so to speak. The other woman has low self esteem and no self respect – she will say anything to justify her actions in order to not feel guilt. Being the other woman doesn’t make you win. It makes you loose….your self esteem, your values, and your character (if you had any) – others will loose any respect that they may have once had for you. The other woman gains lies, deceit and stolen affections – none of which belong to you. But you see, now that I am living this, feeling this, and having to imagine life after this, you do matter. You have made a choice as well. Your choice was to put your feelings above the good of a family. You have chosen to disregard my life, and even worse – the lives of our family. You have chosen to pursue a married man that has a loving family that means the world to him. The fact that he is capable of leaving us without a fight is the most unfathomable of all. If I weren’t hurting so badly and feeling shattered right now I would wish this same fate on you, but I cannot wish this hurt on anyone – it is an agonizing pain, the perfect storm of the soul. Unfortunately for you Melissa, it is not wishes that make these things happen. I believe in karma and I think you should too. We may make choices for ourselves but the universe has a reason for everything, I am a firm believer in that. You have repeatedly covetted my husband and every time I become a shell of myself – crying and sick. But out of that shell has came the one true reason for my life – my family. They are the reason I breathe. So, I can hate you because you mean nothing to me, but I will keep loving him. He and I will always have a bond that you could not understand. And while I will be reasonable about everything else that he and I have to work out concerning our finances and the rest of our lives, the one thing I can and will control is you. We may not have been a concern of yours before, but I guarantee we will become one. You may never spend time with my family or be invited to any life events. I think about all the times my family will not be whole for important life events because of his and your selfishness. You may not have a relationship with them of any kind, and you will never have the chance to know them and love them like their father and I do. This is the consequence of your choices. This may not mean anything to you now, but believe me, without their unconditional love – you only have half a man.
